There are very few college cultures in America as unique as Penn State’s. With this culture comes a few unwritten rules; a guideline of things not to say to other students or alumni. Saying these things put you at risk of becoming a social outlier or in extreme cases, execution. Here are the top 10 statements that are never uttered on Penn State campus.
1. I think Michigan State is a fine institution of higher learning.
Michigan State fans 90% more likely to be a Donald Trump voter than your average citizen.
2. I’m going to stay in tonight and study.
You’re attending Penn State to get an education. What’s wrong with you?
3. I think The Creamery is overrated; Breyers is much tastier.
If I’m going to get diabetes, I’m most content getting it through The Creamery.
4. Mike The Mailman is Overrated
Don’t talk smack about Mike the Mailman.
5. Keith Olbermann is an intelligent guy with many enlightening viewpoints.
Taking a tough stand against charity for childhood cancer. What a guy!
6. I will gladly take you up on that free Bible offer.
“Thanks for the offer sir, but I’m a devout Satanist.”
7. The football games are better on TV. It’s warmer and you get a better view.
8. I 100% agree with the removal of Joe Paterno’s statue.
9. I can’t wait for the college basketball season to start.
Fun Fact: Penn State actually has a Division 1 basketball team. I know, I couldn’t believe it either.
10. Elion is a quick and efficient website.