RELG 271 Lecture Notes - Lecture 12: Sex Worker, Comprehensive Sex Education, Stranger Danger

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Polyamory
-The idea of loving many people
-Pitfalls: is it the same as sex with many people? no because sex does not equal love
-Polyamory —> multiple intimate partnerships by choice
-One of several words for describing multiple-partner intimate relationships (Canadian
polyamory advocacy association)
-“The philosophy and practice of loving or relating intimately to more than one other person at a
time with honesty and integrity”
Polygamy —> more than one spouse at a time
Polygyny - more than one wife
Polyandry - more than one husband
Polyamory?
-“Many loves”
—> “Partner” refers to multiple relationships
—> Relationships vary in degree of closeness and commitment
—> Emphasis on love that can de-emphasize sex
-Intimate friendship (sexual and non-sexual) is central
—> Friendships are generally open and non-exclusive in character
—> Potential for complex images of families of choice
Responsible non-monogamy
-“All partners are aware of and share a consensus on the non-monogamous aspect of their
relationship agreement”
—> Consensus - work of negotiation
—> Honesty - basic axion
-Differentiate polyamory (RNM) from other forms of NM
—> Polyamory emphasizes love
—> Non-monogamy is based in sex
-Promiscuity vs polyfidelity
—> Fewer partners
—> Longer term relationships
—> Neither male or hetero-centric
“The current celebration of love and intimacy usually bolstered the hegemonic idea of the
monogamous long-term couple. Polyamory is an interesting case here. The political and
representational effects of discourses mobilized in polyamory activism are through ambivalent..
Through the promotion of multiple partnerships, polyamory challenges the hegemony of the
core couple as the only valued relationship formation”
Hookup culture
What does”hooking up” mean?
“What defined a hookup more than the sex itself was the perception of its meaning (or lack
thereof) by both parties
Key issues:
—> Determining the meaning of sex
—> Addressing ubiquitous power differentials
—> Getting it done vs getting it on
-What is at risk in a hookup culture? what is the great fear?
Freitas: three qualities of a hookup
1) Sexual content
-Bales are important, not facts
-Mystery and gender politics
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2) Brevity
-Intentionally (not ambiguously) brief
-Ideally uncomplicated (casual)
3) Emotional involvement
-Thwart meaning, purpose and relationship
-Selfish by design and definition
-Skill of divorcing physical intimacy from emotional intimacy
-Emotional payoff is social, not physical
“In the hookup culture, the sex comes first, then openness and communication, but only much,
much later”
-Hookup culture: the unspoken tules of sex on college campuses (NPR)
Debating Marriage
Marriage and sex cant be separated.
1. What business do religious communities have in the bedrooms of their members?
Is it similar tot he state, is it a private issue and religion should have nothing to say? And should
2. Does the state or society as a whole have any business in the sexual ethics of religions?
Should the state be interfering? Does the state have a right to interfere in this area int herms of
traditions?
3. Should society/state influence religions?
Marriage matters Marriage in the Western Tradition - Four Models: — Spiritual — Social—
Contractual: describes marriage as a voluntary association — Naturalist
Models of marriage, Family and Parenting
Model 1: Diversity Model - Acknowledge and values growing diversity in family life
Defines parenthood by quality of relationship
some adult-adult intimacy lead to kids, but not necessarily so
Function, not form
Biology, sex-difference, and gender roles unimportant
Role of law is to support diversity
Model 2: Integrative Model- Family as natural and fundamental group unit
biological reproduction in heterosexual marriage
integration of sexuality into opposite-sex marriage
Adult pair-bonding, sex difference, adult-child relationships
right of children to two biological parents (mother-father team)
caution toward art
2. Evolving Legal Realities: Canada & US
Canada: Court Challenges - Manitoba (1974)
British Columbia Supreme Cout (2001)
Ontario Halpern Judgment (2002)- Judgement: existing legal framework is discriminatory;
therefore 3 options 1. redefine marriage 2. offer something in terms of domestic partnership
(civil untion)3. the state should just get out of marriage business
Quebec decisions (2002)
B.C Appeal (May 2003)
Supreme Court of Canada: 2004
Reference Questions
(1) is redefining marriage int he government’s power?
Marriage - Plural in content and meaning
Content — Sexual relations — Friendship and companionship— Love— Conversation —
Procreation and child-rearing — mutual responsibility
Meaning— civil rights aspect — expressive aspect— religious aspect
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Document Summary

Pitfalls: is it the same as sex with many people? no because sex does not equal love. One of several words for describing multiple-partner intimate relationships (canadian polyamory advocacy association) The philosophy and practice of loving or relating intimately to more than one other person at a time with honesty and integrity . Polygamy > more than one spouse at a time. > relationships vary in degree of closeness and commitment. > emphasis on love that can de-emphasize sex. > friendships are generally open and non-exclusive in character. > potential for complex images of families of choice. All partners are aware of and share a consensus on the non-monogamous aspect of their relationship agreement . Differentiate polyamory (rnm) from other forms of nm. The current celebration of love and intimacy usually bolstered the hegemonic idea of the monogamous long-term couple. The political and representational effects of discourses mobilized in polyamory activism are through ambivalent

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