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McMaster University
Social Sciences
Geraldine Voros

Women & Family – Mar 6 Communication COMMUNICATION IS AN IMPORTANT VARIABLE - Building and maintaining an active process - Four elements: o Talking o Listening o Negotiating o Problem Solving - Must be open, realistic, tactful, caring, valued, fair and well defined  Has to be democratic – both parties have to be able to speak o Tactful in the sense that you say things in a thoughtful kind of way o Use a disclaimer first: “I don’t mean to hurt you or insult you but this is what I see…” (Being truthfully tactful)  Important to communicate fairly and define things clearly & be open and honest  If we have good communication, we are minimizing hostilities Communication Continued Conflict Management - Repertoire of multiple attitudes  Can become a grounds of conflict  Things are best discussed in the fashion that we learn to discuss them in our tender years  Some people are socialized to apologize immediately, other people think they can do no wrong and don’t need to apologize Failure of Communication - People choose not to communicate o Because there is a surplus of negative comments or a process of aversive communication - Adverse communication o Based on the principle that when we do communicate, we can communicate in the way we see pleasure or pain o We usually look for a pleasant exchange o Aversive communication comes about when there is a conversation that causes pain or anger  Counterproductive move that results in the termination of communication o Example in literature: “socks, I need socks” other person “socks that you never pick up and put in the laundry?” first person “what the laundry that only gets done once every three weeks” (and banter goes on back and forth)
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