Lecture 5 - soc 244
Mating, Marriage and the Gendered Division of Labour
slide 2 - Exchange theory – assumes that individual minimize the costs of being in a
The rewards: you feel loved, afffected, intimate, someone attrative wealthy, but there are
also costs invovled: the thigns you have to put into someones relatinship: for exmaple
mellys annoying little weird sayings.
- We scream at people that are dramatically different from us – patterns of
monogamy- couple who share very similar factors, eg education, culture etc. and
dotochomy – marrying someone else tha tis dutch like yourself.
- slide 3 - Found that females who found males that are less attractive with better
- -they did a cross cultural study looking at japanse and russian studnets – found
that men rated physical attrativeness more then women. Women placed more
imporatce on: money, social status, intelligence etc.
- - men placed high value on physical attractivesness.
- slide 4 - If owmen consistently marired up – in terms of education – theres two
groups of popele that are left out – the highly educated women – and poorl
educated lower income men.
- Higher educated women have aharder time finding partners. – higher rates of
divroce and dissatisfaction
- Women with high level of eduactiona nd income have experienced lower
marriage rates. – if they get apired up with men with lower educational
- slide 5 - Psychomadynomic – influence of childhood and the choices that you
make when you are in your twenties for example, looks at childhood and family.
- - men will tend to choose a partner that shares a resemblance to his mother- and
women tend to choose a partner that has characteristics thatr esembe her father-
- More contemporary studies- 1984- tested this theory and found that combinality
on traits occurred very often.
- Needs theory- a nurtured person is one that likes to be cared for others- younger
sibling tends to be more suckered – someone that needs to be taken care off while
the older sibling is more independent – complementary needs theory – idea that
we are looking for needs.
- - builds on people seek relationships that provides maximum satisfaction &
penalized very minimally for their own needs. – states women will look for men
whos stronger – who will fulfill her needs. slide 6 - Exchange- the indiviaul is going to get as much out of it- as much as they put
If a relationsgip progresses equalily – then onepartner is constatntly moving – and
thereyby expoliting the other and the relationship cannot continue- you cant contantly
take and take and not putting it in – you need equality on int.
eQuity theory- fairness is the key to the successful relationship theory.
Development process theory – these theories look at mate selection as aprocess of
filtering out- going through all these people to go to find that one person.
- They go to various stages: Propinquit- geogrpahy is an important factor- you meet
pepople in your work place, school,
- Attraction: people are drawn to people – man place a great deal on phsycail
attractivesnes then women place
- Homogramy- choose ppl with similar chracterisitics.
- Compatiblity – idea with being able to live with somebody in some state of the
- There are also situational factors: pregnacy – for exmaple you suddnely find out
your preogant – unexpected – so you suddnely in a marriag – very complex
- slide 7- She writes that the rpocess of marriage varies depending what country
your talking about and what historical moment you are talking about.
- - germany and japan- had a sharp contract – becuae they were focusd on
increasing the birht rate and in other countries they were trying to decrease the
birth rate process.
- - the focus was on abstience in the US, while in Japan- there werent as much
individuals having children.
- THE United Nations- girls can be wed at very young ages- 13, 14, singapore on
the other hand- convinced ppl to marry at a young age, in spain more then 50% of
the women aged 25 – 29 – are single. This is problematic for the nations birth rate
and for future ppl.
- between the age of 30 -35 – choosing to live with their parents rather then start
their own families.
- - china- strict one child policy – shapr rise in the birth rate of boys. – the abortion
of female babies.
- - everywher she writes – becoming more vulnerable
- The relationships of true men and women have changed more in the 30 years then
they have in the previos 3,000 years.
- So have the roles of men,women and children in those families.
- This is what Stephanie Coontz writes.
- - both men and women shared the taks of childbearing – the houshold was both a
unit pf roduction and consumption in 1960’s ther were beginning to be changes.
- In the 18th century – this move towards marriage. – ppl choosing love, marriage
during this age. - - contemporarily the seuxalization of marriage – this represented a logical step in
the evolution of marriage.
- It was a revolution expeirnce – emerging from the englightenment – looking for
your own self actualization – and encouraging indiviausl o seek out love – sor tof
18-th and 19th century –the fuction of marriage really started to change. 0they
were beginning tobecome love based marriages.
- Historicall ymost marraiges were not about the indiviaul, or their desires or love it
was about finding good inlaws.
slide 8 - - Allowed fmaily to have connections and netowkrs – if your going to have bad
crops they can help – maraige is about making connections and important relationships –
for exmaple before these families satrted to change this is how the old family used to be.
slide 9 - Society becomes more complex. Money and welath – keeping t in within a
*****During marriage you see the money coming in. for thousands of eyars marriage
was about poverty and politics rather then personal satisfaction.
It was about the divisin of labour and exchange.
It doesn’t deny that love didn’t exist – marriages were nto about love – it was considered
-maintaining power and property.
The importance of establishing cooperative relationships – back in the day.
However, when marriage is stil vital for family contiunity- the choice of marriage still
apears to be too important to be left to the indiviausl choic e- in many communities for
eg, parents taking a large role in partnering their children, f