November 21 2013t
Why do we form relationships in the first place?
- Social functions are adaptive
- We need to belong
- We affiliate to understand the world and ourselves better (social validation)
- I need social validation to test the truth/validate my perspective.
- Efficacy: sense of competence, ability to control the environment.
- Enhancement: ability to enhance ourselves by socializing with successful
people because I want to be successful. – In eastern culture, rather than
enhancing the self, they become very empathetic towards themselves.
- Trust: We have positive expectations. Developing time, context is what leads
- support, warmth or instrumental care.
Exchange of goods and services.
Expectations of responsibilities to ingroup members.
Who we affiliate with?
- Close to us in proximity
- Familiar to us
- Similar to us
- Physically attractive
- Have some admired skill/quality
- Like us/similarities
- not a concept to westerners
- individualistic assumptions:
- a person will only love someone that they’ve chosen.
- Love is a choice, based on a unique connection.
- A marriage with no love is bound to be miserable.
- In collectivistic cultures, marriage is not regarded as a union of 2 individuals,
rather it is a union of 2 families.
- Collectivistic assumptions:
- Love is assumed to grow out of marriage
- Love is sanctioned only between certain partners.
- Sanctioned love can act as important social glue.
It is seen as important for cementing family liaisons, building new economic ties,
and maintaining the influence of extended network.
What is well-being?
- health, happiness, life satisfaction. - Most people are happy with their lives wellbeing
- A disposition toward pleasant affect facilitates exploratory behavior,
supporting evolutionary advantages.
- Denmark: Happiest country based on research. good health care, good
wealth, good education.
- Lifestyle in Denmark is different. More time to spend with family rather than
working long hours. Environment