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Lecture 5

Readings of week 5-6.docx

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University of Toronto Scarborough
Ping- Chun Hsiung

Bonnie Fox: Becoming Parents  Focuses on the necessary factors to intensive mothering  Gender Inequalities big issues  Mothers: responsible for the well being of their child (following mother hood ideals/expectations about womanhood)  Intensive mothering ideals are found in books for parents  Parents have to negotiate infant care  Contradictions: they assume that woman are naturally suited for mothering ,  Intensive mothering: involves huge commitment, it is very costly,  Dealing with new demands mothers often take childbirth course, read about parenting, so be a fit for the role  Woman practising intensive mothering believed that the treatment they gave their babies would shape their dispositions and even influence their intellectual development  Others: believed worried about the damage they might get if they do not provide focus childcare  Middle Class Woman: who develop intensive mothering practices - had support and help form their parents and close family members vs. Working class woman who did not breast feed their kids  Woman felt or were made to feel, like they owed their parents for the time and energy woman were spending on the baby : Woman's catering to men is likely at the heart of the gender inequities that are often intensified with parenthood  Men in fatherhood: they hoped for a special relationship with a child, have a family, or because their wife wanted a child. The role of fatherhood was because of the nature of his relationship with his wife or whether or not their economy of care involved mutual exchanges of care and efforts she made to encourage or insist that he be involved in the baby's care.  Woman expected men to help overcome feelings of marginality, incompetence or insisted that they be involved in the care of their baby - affected the role of men  Men's motives were usually about helping their partners, the nature of the couple relationship was critical to the men's level of involvement. As a result, fulfilling their role as wife ws how many woman drew their partners into active baby care - except for those couple whose economy of care involved reciprocal care giving Considerations  Intensive mothers were confident and successful  Baby focused practices they developed were aimed at shaping their children and predicated on a middle class sense of efficacy and on the material circumstances of middle class life  Intensive mothering incurred some costs: battled anger, depression, exhaustion in their first year of motherhood  Anger - associated with mothering an infant or no support from their partners  Depression- constraints in their lives because they had to stay home and they felt trapped  It basically took a toll on people who practised it  Sustaining intensive mothering over the course of the year was difficult and only did it for 6 months then returned to work or school replying on other (family), hiring a nanny,  Woman needed their parents contest and support and involvement in baby care  This shows that intensive mothering is dependent on the help and support of woman's partners and motherhood bound the women who practises it to their husbands  This meant: men shared domestic responsibilities before parenthood, and seen the baby as a "joint project" - men had more respect for woman too  Woman lost some of the autonomy which they had before: they were bound to the baby and the daily care of they gave their baby was very salient to their parents:  Ex) one woman felt that she could not stop breast feeding her baby because her husband valued the breast milk and the weight he carried in decisions regarding their baby  Some felt pressured to leave their career to the demands of "family time"  But at the same time, intensive mothers pressured their husbands as well to be involved in intensive baby care  THEY FELT THEY HAD THE RIGHT TO MAKE CLAIMS ON THE OTHER IF THOSE WERE ABOUT THE BABYS WELFARE  Less intensive mothers: were dependent on their parents, need of their support and help.  If their economy of care did not feature reciprocal exchanges of care, woman had to cater to their parents to get their help: a majority of woman in the study had to work to construct their parents "involvement" in infant care and this involved catering to the men  Fatherhood: was the product of woman's work as wives and a privileged position Thus: parenthood increased the equalities in the couple's relationships Fathering in the Shadows: Indigenous Fathers and Canada's Colonial Legacies by JESSICABALL:  article is a report on influences on Indigenous men's ability to successfully care for their children and considers the regeneration of positive father involvement in socio-cultural communities where the meaning and practice of father care for children has been drastically diminished Extra: Fathers did not know how many kids they had Not really involved in their Childs life: some condition of their parole Theme: communities agreed that the theme of lack of exposure to positive fatherhood in their childhoods and in their community's best accounted for many of the challenges they faced when they became father six domains of influences that were frequently invoked in fathers' accounts: (1) Personal wellness: highest rates of mental illness, addictions, and sui- cide among ethnic groups in Canada (2) Learning fathering: wellness; pressures from partners and other family members; learning to manage relationships with other adults involved with their children to sustain contact with their children; and the absence of a child's mother due to her death, disappearance, incarceration or departure. Bravery was a term used by several fathers as they described needing time, healing, and social support to "get up the courage to reach out to my kids." Role models: mothers. Learning how to be fathers from their own mothers or from their female partner was a theme in 13 percent of fathers' accounts. Most of these fathers were raised primarily or exclusively by their mothers. (3) socio- economic inclusion: highest unemployment, greatest poverty, lowest education, highest homelessness, highest mobility, lowest marriage, and lowest household incomes among population groups in Canada - identified poverty as a barrier to fathering and family well-being attributed this to various government policies and interventions (4) Social support: they needed time to learn to manage relationships with their children's mothers, extended families, foster parents, and family service workers (5) Legislative and policy support: Fathers described encountering roadblocks to accessing paperwork and notary services for registering their paternity on children's birth records, accessing legal advice to establish or enforce shared custody or visitation with a child after separation or divorce, or accessing treatment services or parenting supports to meet criteria for the return of a child from government care (6) Cultural continuity: Several fathers identified the need for print materials and programs specifically tailored for Indigenous fathers. Many participants in the research expressed regrets about not being able to share their cultural and linguistic heritage with their children Ex) Knowing about your culture has a huge impact on your parenting because if you have no knowledge of where you come from or your roots, it leaves a gap in your child's upbringing, their identity, self-esteem, and self worth Conclusions  Indigenous fathers are the most sociall
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