We want to be 1) autonomous (decide when to do
things), 2) competent (do things well) and 3) belong.
Rewarding increases a behavior and punishment
decreases a behavior.
When you deviate from the norm: social
rejection/ostracize out of group, people make you act
like the norm, isolate them (cut them off but can be
unintentional), indirect punishment (talking behind
their back), demonize the person (one bad trait means
they have many bad traits).