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Interpersonal Love

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Western University
Psychology 2035A/B
Doug Hazlewood

Psych 2035 – Monday October 15 , 2012 Interpersonal Attraction & Love > Dean of Indiana University sailed to Ireland alone. - Would he do it again? NO - did not enjoy being alone > Psychologist offered students 50 dollars a day to stay in a room alone with no contact - would you be down for the challenge? Interpersonal Attraction Part 1: specific factors (text p 247- 280) A. in initial encounters: - proximity - familiarity - physical attractiveness B. when getting acquainted: - reciprocal liking - similarity Part 2: General theories of Attraction 1. The Reinforcement-Affect Model A. Rewards lead to positive affect (feelings); Punishments lead to negative affect B. We’ll like people who reward us and dislike people who punish us but, that’s not all: C. We’ll like/dislike people even when they don’t cause our pos/neg feelings  they simply have to be present when we experience positive or negative affect (eg. Hot rooms, bad news, unpleas, music) * in one study people were put in a room with stranger in comfortable/uncomfortable temperatures…the stranger was liked more in comfortable temperatures…stranger has nothing to do with temperatures - also with bad news, bad music. Social exchange theories (relationships) > A relationship exists whenever people interact on a regular basis A. satisfaction with a relationship depends on: 1. rewards (what a person receives) 2. costs (what person contributes) B. rewards and costs can be expressed in terms of a ratio: R/C - its nice to get out what you put in C. when rewards equal or exceed costs, we will be satisfied with the relationship D. when costs exceed the rewards, we will be dissatisfied with the relationship 1. Equity Theory A. considers rewards and costs of both people in the relationship B. equity exists when one person’s ratio of rewards to costs equals the other person’s ratio of rewards to cost ( satisfying) YOU YOUR PARTNER R/C: 10/10 = 10/10 R/C: 1/1 = 1/1 R/C: 10/10 = 1/1 * Imagine you are in a relationship and you’re putting a lot in and getting a lot out, but your partner is getting little out and putting little out…your costs are not the same C. inequality exists when one person’s ratio (of rewards to costs) does not equal the other persons ratio YOU YOUR PARTNER R/C 2/8 # 8/2 - you are being “under-benefitted” - your partner is “over-benefitted” D. inequity makes the relationship unpleasant: - under-benefitted person feels angry - over-benefitted person feels guilty E. so people will attempt to restore equity. How? - attempt to alter the actual rewards/costs - psychologically alter the perceived rewards/costs *make yourself feel better, your partner is not trying hard F. what if equity can’t be restored? - leave the relationship 2. Interdependency theory: A. satisfaction also depends on the action of rewards/costs that we expect to receive B. expectations can be based on: - our own experiences in prior relationships - in what we know about others relationships > the comparison level (CL) * current relationship to past relationship C. different people can have different comparison levels - because different people have different levels of experience PERSONS A B C current R/C = 5/5 5/5 5/5 expected R/C = 5/5 5/10 10/5 OK OK! NOT OK D. whether we leave the relationship depends on the comparison level of alternatives - if there is an alternative that provides better R/C ration, then we will leave the current relatio
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