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Chapter 11 Lecture 2.doc

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Psychology 2035A/B
Doug Hazlewood

1 Interpersonal Attraction & Love October-17-11 7:06 PM • Dean of Indiana University - sailed a boat from East coast of U.S. - 51 days later he arrived in Ireland o Very lonely o When asked if he would do it again he said no - too much of an ordeal - second month loneliness was excruciating • Around same time, psychologist at Columbia University offered students $50 a day to stay in a room alone by themselves without any contact with the outside world o No one lasted longer than 8 days o One student only 20 minutes • Why are we not attracted to everybody? INTERPERSONAL ATTRACTION Part 1: Specific Factors (text p. 247-280) 1.In initial encounters: o Proximity o Familiarity o Physical attractiveness 2.When getting acquainted: o Reciprocal liking o Similarity Part 2: General Theories of Attraction 9.The Reinforcement-Affect Model 1.Rewards lead to positive affect (feelings); Punishments lead to negative affect 2.We'll like people who reward us and dislike people who punish us But, that's not all: 3.We'll like/dislike people even when they don't cause our positive/negative feelings --> they simply have to be present when we experience positive or negative affect! (e.g., hot rooms; bad news; unpleasant music) o The stranger was liked more in the room that was at a comfortable temperature; stranger was liked less in the room that was uncomfortably hot 35. Social Exchange Theories o Focus explicitly on attraction in relationships A relationship exists whenever people interact on a regular basis. e.g., marriage, carpool, study group, professor and student 1.Satisfaction with a relationship depends on o Rewards (what person "receives") • Affection, intimacy, companionship, approval, sex o Costs (what person "contributes") • Time, effort, compromises, suffering (arguments), you can't date other people 2.Rewards and Costs can be expressed in terms of a ratio: R/C • Arguments of whether it should be expressed as a ration or as Rewards - Costs • For our discussion, we're thinking about it in terms of a ratio • It's nice to get as much out as we put in to a relationship 3.When rewards equal or exceed costs, we will be satisfied with the relationship 4.When costs exceed rewards, we will be dissatisfied e.g., carpool • Benefits vs. Costs • Benefits: cheaper, friend to talk to, avoid crowded buses • Costs: can't sleep in all the time, can't just leave after class • If costs exceed rewards you will be dissatisfied with this relationship • In the first 3 months of a relationship, costs aren't so important • After 3 months, couple begin to be sensitive to both rewards and costs (1) Equity Theory • Considers rewards and costs of both people in the relationship • "Equity" exists when one person's ratio of rewards to costs equals the other person's ratio of rewards to costs YOU YOUR PARTNER Rewards/ 10/ 10/ Costs 10 10 YOU YOUR PARTNERR/C 1/1 1/1 • Note equity is not the same as equality • That is, the actual rewards and costs don't have to be equal • Only the ratio of rewards to costs has to be the same YOU YOUR PARTNER R/C 10/10 1/1 • Your rewards and costs are not equal to your partner's rewards and costs • So you have 10x the rewards and costs • But the ratios are equal • Thus, this is an equitable relationship and should be satisfying • "Inequity" exists when one person's ratio (of rewards to costs) does not equal the other person's ratio YOU YOUR PARTNER R/C 2/8 8/2 • This is an inequitable relationship • You are "under-benefited" • Your partner is "over-benefited" • Inequity makes the relationship unpleasant: • Under-benefitted person feels "angry"; • Over-benefitted person feels "guilty" • In either case, equity theory predicts that the people involved in the relationship will not be satisfied with the relationship • So, people will attempt to restore equity. HOW? • Attempt to alter the actual rewards/costs • Who will do this? • The under-benefitted person is more likely to changes the actual rewards/costs • You might simply put less into the relationship • Psychologically alter the perceived rewards/costs • Who will do this? • The over-benefitted person • In order to feel less guilty, will convince themselves that partner is really putting that much into the relationship or that they're getting a lot more out of the relationship than what they're saying • What if equity can't be restored? • Presumably, people will leave the relationship (2) Interdependency Theory • Satisfaction also depends on the ratio of rewards/costs that we expect to receive from out relationship; • Expectations can be base on:  Our own experiences in prior relationships,  What we know about others' relationships --> The "Comparison Level" [CL] • Different people can have different comparison levels: • Consider Persons A, B and C • Not in a relationship with each other • But they are all currently in a relationship with somebody else • All 3 of them are experiencing the same level of rewards/costs (5/5) - they're putting a moderate amount in and they're getting a moderate amount; all in equitable relationships A B C Current R/C 5/5 5/5 5/5 Expected (CL) R/C 5/5 5/10 10/5 Ok Ok! Not Ok • B doesn't usually get as much as they put in to their past relationships • So should they be satisfied with their current relationship? B is exceeding their expected
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