PSY BEH 118D Lecture Notes - Lecture 11: Nonverbal Communication
17 May 2018
School
Department
Course
Professor
Chapter 11: Attraction, Love, Communication Continued
• Jealous
o When does jealousy occur?
▪ jealousy occurs when an individual interprets some stimulus as
representing a threat to a valued relationship
▪ in reality, there may or may not be a threat to the relationship
o attempts to cope with jealousy
▪ lead to a variety of behaviors
▪ constructive: effective communication
▪ destructive: aggression
o attachment style and jealousy
▪ attachment style may be an important influence on how that person
responds to jealousy
▪ secure: express anger to the partner
▪ anxious-ambivalent: don’t express
▪ avoidant: direct anger toward 3rd party
• communication
o gender differences in communication
▪ men and women not that different
▪ differences are pretty small
▪ there are some small, but interesting differences
▪ women more skilled at
• reading nonverbal cues
• comforting
• not interrupting
▪ different topics of conversation in same gender conversations
▪ women are more self-disclosing
• only true in same-gender pairs
• men disclose plenty when talking to women
▪ flirting, gender, and non-verbal communication
• making the initial contact
• smile, space, gaze, touch, voice animation and warmth
o communication and relationships
▪ Gottman identified 4 destructive patterns of interaction
• criticism: attacking personality, character
• contempt: insulting, verbally abusing
• defensiveness: reply with complaint
• withdrawal (stonewalling)
▪ being an effective communicator
• good messages
o complaining (vs. criticizing)
o documenting: being specific
o offer limited choices: talk now or later?
• leveling & editing
o leveling: stating thoughts clearly and honestly
o editing: censoring things that would be hurtful
find more resources at oneclass.com
find more resources at oneclass.com
