FRHD 1020 Chapter Notes - Chapter 3: Sex Education, Pasteurization, Polyamory

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Published on 26 Jun 2012
School
University of Guelph
Department
Family Relations and Human Development
Course
FRHD 1020
FRHD*1020: Couple and Family Relations
Chapter 3: Getting Together
-Marriage is the norm: most people marry at some point in their lives. Society encourages marriage
-the number of cohabitation (people living together without marriage or before marriage) is increasing
Setting the Family Cycle Turning
-the most important developmental task in young adulthood is the establishment of intimacy (close
emotional relationship) according to Erik Erikson, psychiatrist
-a second developmental task is building the foundation for the couple’s relationship (ex, verbal/non-
verbal communication, trust…)
-symbolic-interactionists thin that the pattern of relationships is established from the earliest
interchanges between partner
-couples that do not have a free choice of a partner, basis of the relationship is established before
marriage, but personal aspects of the relationship may not develop until after
Mate Selection and Society
-Courtships are divided into 2 basic streams: (both closely tied to values and traditions of cultures)
-those decided by the couple
-those decided by the families of the couple
-In Asian Indian families, men provide financial support for their families of procreation as well as needy
relatives. Well-being of the family as a whole takes priority over individual happiness. It should be no
surprise that marriages are arranged, both to maintain appropriate status and to increase family
economic well-being.
-mainstream North American culture values individual achievement (contrast to Asian Indians). All
people are responsible for their own success and well-being of their families of procreation. Both males
and females are valued. ‘Family’ tends to be defined for narrowly, when social security system fails,
extended family members aren’t expected to help, instead society is supposed to fill the gap
-In both societies, there are close links between macrosystem (culture), exosystem, mesosytem, and
microsystem.
-structional-funcitonalists: cultural values, norms and roles are maintained through socialization.
-symbolic-interactionalists: socialization occurs in day-to-day transactions with those around us
The Courtship Continuum
Completely arranged marriages |----------------------------------------------------|Completely self-chosen unions
Marriage as exchange |--------------------------------------------------------------------| Marriage as shared emotion
-Arranged marriage: often couple not forced into union if either is opposed; tend to pay more attention
to benefit of new union
-Self-chosen marriage: often consider feelings of family; tend emphasize shared emotions (love,
companionship)
-Right-hand side more closely related to symbolic interaction
-Several studies show exchange theory acting during courtship: men show off their material assets,
women emphasize physical appearance
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FRHD*1020: Couple and Family Relations
Matchmaker, Matchmaker Arranging Marriages
-children were considered a family asset: expected to aid the family through work or by
preserving/improving their social standing through marriage
-In some societies, social class and family descent are important
-Matchmakers and parents decide on eligibility, similarity of background, horoscopes, financial and
social position, and, if the couple is fortunate, the personalities of prospective bride and groom
-Endogamy: marriage within the same group (social level) these types of systems may allow some
choice of the marriage partner (parents seek approval of the young people before final plans are made)
-Arranged marriages are considered unions of the whole groups; extended family is involved in the
couple’s relationship (European royalty treaty, marriage for political benefit)
-Arranged marriage in Canada: young people were encouraged by wealthy landowner parents to marry
for family and property (new France & upper Canada)
-in many cases, the bride or groom sees marriage as a route to immigration; in return they offer their
ability to earn a living and keep up religious and cultural traditions
The Shift Toward Free Choice
-European based shift from arranged to free choice: shift hasn’t been smooth, some parts moved faster
than others
Early Years of Settlement
-North American practices were related to three phases:
1) the exploration of the wilderness harsh conditions, few white women, men formed unions with
Aboriginals (exchange of goods for expertise in wilderness travel and survival or to cement trading or
military alliances)
2) the establishment of the new settlements settlers moved into areas already mapped byte
traders and explorers, frontier saw an influx of unattached men (provided opportunity for enterprising
young men), freedom
3) the growth of larger towns and cities: less dependent on parents for financial survival, more
freedom of choice
A New Custom Dating (And Beyond)
Dating
-WW1 transformed Canadian society rise of dating. Single men and women went out alone without
any particular intention of marrying each other. 1914, Canada was mainly farms/small towns. 1918,
Canada became an industrial nation.
-Four functions of dating:
1) It can add to a person’s status if the date is the ‘right’ person
2) It can be a form of socialization because it provides opportunity for members of both sexes to learn
how to get along with each other
3) Dating is a form of recreated, engaged in for fun
4) Dating can be a part of courtship, with the purpose of marriage
-If man and woman had different reasons for dating, their relationship may be in trouble. Person with
the least to lose usually controlled the relationship.
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Document Summary

Marriage is the norm: most people marry at some point in their lives. The number of cohabitation (people living together without marriage or before marriage) is increasing. The most important developmental task in young adulthood is the establishment of intimacy (close emotional relationship) according to erik erikson, psychiatrist. A second developmental task is building the foundation for the couple"s relationship (ex, verbal/non- verbal communication, trust ) Symbolic-interactionists thin that the pattern of relationships is established from the earliest interchanges between partner. Couples that do not have a free choice of a partner, basis of the relationship is established before marriage, but personal aspects of the relationship may not develop until after. Courtships are divided into 2 basic streams: (both closely tied to values and traditions of cultures) Those decided by the families of the couple. In asian indian families, men provide financial support for their families of procreation as well as needy relatives.

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