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Chapter 10

Psych of sex final exam textbook notes Chapter 10,11,12,19 and reading .doc

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Department
Psychology
Course
Psychology 2075
Professor
William Fisher
Semester
Winter

Description
Final Exam Psych Notes Chapter 12:Attraction, Love and Communication PAIR: PersonalAssessment of Intimacy in Relationships − measures emotional intimacy − intimate relationship is characterized by commitment, feelings of closeness and understanding, and self-disclosure Love  2 ends of the scale (hookups to romantic love relationships)  theory of love as a story, toward the middle sex is really love Triangular Theory of Love  3 components of love are intimacy, passion, and commitment  top point is intimacy, lower left is passion, lower right is decision/commitment Intimacy: emotional component of love, includes feelings, self disclosure (may be found btwn friends) Passion: motivational component of love, includes physical attraction and drive for sexual expression Commitment: cognitive component of love. Short-term decision is whether one loves the other person. Long-term aspect is commitment to maintain the relationship  high levels of all 3 result in good love  when all 3 components are present, lovers feel satisfied, but if all 3 aren't represented, lovers feel mismatched  Sternberg argues that the 3 components must be translated into action  he developed the Sternerg Triangular Love Scale (STLS) to measure the 3 components  commitment scores increase as one goes from dating to marriage, intimacy decreased  theory predicts that amount of passion should be related to sexual activity, but results showed intimacy was most related to sex Attachment Theory of Love  attachment between infant and parent affects us for the rest of our lives  adults are characterized in romantic relationships by 1/4 attachment styles  we either see ourselves in a negative way unworthy of love, or a positive way as worthy of love Positive model: self-confident, seek others out Negative model: anxious about relationships, avoid intimacy Secure Lovers: sense of own lovability and expectation that other people are generally accepting and responsive Preoccupied Lovers: sense of own lovability but a positive evaluation of other people. Try to achieve self-acceptance by gaining acceptance of people they value. Worried that partner does not love them thay may scare them away Fearful Lovers: negative expectation of themselves and other people. Expect to be rejected by others and avoid romantic relationships. Uncomfortable feeling close to and trusting another person Dismissing Lovers: feel themselves to be worthy of love, but have negative views of other people. These people may protect themselves against disappointment by avoiding close relationships and being independent.  dismissing and fearful lovers both avoid intimacy  preoccupied and fearful lovers both depend on acceptance from others to feel good  1/2 of adults have secure attachment, 12% are preoccupied, 21% fearful, 18% dismissing  separation from parents in childhood is not related to adult attachment styles  what predicts attachment style is the person's perception of the quality of relationship with each parent  children identified as securely attached at 12 months were rated more socially competent by teachers  similarity in attachment style is important for a relationship  people with secure styles respond constructively to potentially destructive behaviour by the partner, people with fearful styles respond with avoidance or withdrawal. Having an insecure style has been proven to relate to lower sexual satisfaction Jealousy: cognitive, emotional, behavioural repsonse to a threat to an interpersonal relationship − cognitive aspect suggests jealousy occurs when individuals interpret some stimulas as a threatened Emotional Jealousy: occurs when 1 person believes that partner is emotionally attached to or in love with another Sexual Jealousy: ocurs when person believes that partner wants to engage in sexual intimacy with another − men and women are both more concerned with emotional infidelity than sexual infidelity − stages in jealousy are cognitive (initial appraisal of situation), Emotional reaction (stress response and reappraisal stage) − persons attachment style may relate to how someone responds to jealousy- secure people expressed anger and maintained the relationship, preoccupied style reported most intense anger but were not likely to express it, fearful people were likely to direct their anger toward a third person Love as a Story:  love includes interation between 2 people and how each partner interprets the interaction war story: relationship that involves constant fighting, central characters are warriors fighting for what they believe  according to this view falling in love occurs when you meet someone with whom you can create a relationship that fits your love story  each person has more than one story, evolving from a hierarchy, and are self-fulfilling  couples generally believe in the same love story, and the more discrepant the stories, the less happy the couple was  garden story (loves need cultivation) is higher satisfaction, business story and horror story had less satisfaction  components similar to both cultures are objectification-threat, nurturing-caring, pornography, and pragmatism Biology of Passionate Love  differentiates between passionate love and companionate love Passionate Love: a state of intense longing for union with the other person and of intense physiological arousal- has 3 components. Cognitive (preoccupation with loved one and idealization of the person), emotional ( phyysiological desire, sexual attraction, arrousal), and behavioural ( taking care of one another)  we focus on strengths of relationship and minimize negative aspects Companionate Love: feeling of deep attachment and commitment toa person with whom one has an intimate relationship.  transformation from passionate love to companionate love occurs 6-30 months through the relationship  sexual desire is motivational state leading to search for opportunities for sexual activity  romantic love is motivational state leading to attachment and commitment  from evolutionary perspective, there are three internal systems involved in reproducing: desire to mate, pairing (mating), and parenting  dopamine is released in female mating, dopamine enhances bone. Prolactin and oxytocin are produced by passionate love. Oxytocin may play a role in maintaining a relationship. Operational definition: defining some concept or term by how it is measured- for example, defining intelligence as those abilities that are measured by IQ tests  Passionate Love Scale (PLS) measures love and commitment and satisfaction  PLS scores increase as relationship moves forward Two-Component Theory of Love  passionate love occurs when two conditions exist simultaneously: 1) person is in state of intense physiological arousal and 2) situation is such that the person applies a particular label to situations being experienced  emotion consists of physiological state and label that person assigns to it  men who ran produced pounding heart which is similar response to liking an attractive woman They rated the liking for an attractive woman, and men who ran reported higher ratings than the men who didn't run. Misattribution of arousal: when a person in a stage of physiological arousal ( from exercising or being frightened) attributes these feelings to love or attraction to the person present  men in a state of fear are more attracted to women than men in a relaxed state Cross-Cultural Values and the Meaning of Love  2 dimensions on which cultures vary- individualism. Individualistic emphasize individual goals and collectivist emphasize group goals. 2 is independence-interdependence.  Most individuals regardless of culture rate inteligence, kidness, and understanding at top of list  many individualistic cultures wouldn't marry unless they were in love, whereas women in collectivist cultures would marry even if they weren't in love Communication  distressed couples have communication deficits  heterosexual and homosexual couples don't differ in their sexuality  couples with sexual problems have poorer sexual and non-sexual communication than couples without sexual problems  unrewarding and ineffective communication precedes and predicts later relationship problems  4 destructive patterns of interaction: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, withdrawal Sexual self-disclosure: telling personal sexual things about yourself such as sexual likes/dislikes  97% of Canadians say they are able to openly discuss sex with a partner  the more 1 partner reported self-disclosing about sex, the more their partner did so  sexual self-disclosure leads to sexual satisfaction by increasing intimacy between partners and allows us to learn about our sexual preferences − man who had an arranged marriage had a relationship based on 6 qualities: love, openness, non- judgemental attitude, respect, commitment, and trust − people with disabilities have the same sexual desires as us Being an effective communicator: 1) decide to talk to one's partner Intent: what the speaker means Impact: what someone else understands the speaker to mean Effective communicator: a communicator whose impact matches his or her intent “I” Language: speaking for yourself, using the word “I”, not mind reading − by using “I” language your partner is less likely to get defensive Mind reading: making assumptions about what partner thinks/feels Documenting: giving specific examples of the issue being discussed Levelling: telling your partner what you are feeling by stating your thoughts clearly Editing: censoring things that would be deliberately hurtful to your partner or that are irrelevant. − research shows married people are ruder to each other than they are to strangers − be a non-defensive listener − give feedback, and paraphrase, ask for feedback Non-verbal communication: communication not through words, but through the body − distressed couples differ more in their non-verbal communication than their verbal communication Validation: telling your partner that, given his point of view, you can see why he thinks a certain way − accentuate the positive − non-distressed couples make more positive and fewer negative communications . There's a magic ratio of positive to negative communication. In stable marriages there is 5x as much positive interaction Fighting Fair: set of rules designed to make arguments constructive rather than destructive − although there are some gender differences in communication, the differences are small Online Reading: Brief Overview ofAttachment Theories  research guided by principle that same bond between children and parents guides bond between partners  attachment theory developed by Bowlby  attachment behaviours are adaptive responses from separation from an attachment figure  attachment behaviour system is a motivational system designed to regulate proximity to an attachment figure  attachment system essentially "asks" the following question: Is the attachment figure nearby, accessible, and attentive?  If answer to above question is yes, child feels secure and is more likely to be social with others. If answer is no, child will have anxiety  developed “strange situation”- 12 mnth old infants and parents are brought into lab and separated from each other. In strange situation, children behave with normative model- they are upset but when parents return to room they seek parent and are comforted. These children are secure. Other children become distressed when separated and when reunited they have a difficult time being soothed- these children are anxious resistant.Some children don't appear distressed by separation and after reunion avoid seeking contact with the parent- these children are avoidant  children who appear secure have parents who are responsive to their needs, children who are anxious resistant or avoidant have parents who are inconsistent, rejecting, or insensitive to children's needs  they argue that adult relationships and caregiving relationships are parallel on many levels, and therefore romantic love is a property of the attachment behavioural system 3 implications of AdultAttachment Theory: 1) If adult relationships are attachment relationships, the way adult relationships work should be similar to the way caregiving relationships work 2) If adult relationships are attachment relationships, we should see similar kinds of individual differences in adult relationships that are observed in caregiving relationships 3) whether and adult is secure/insecure in adult relationship may be a reflection of their experience with their primary caregivers -2 important dimensions with respect to attachment patterns: 1) attachment related anxiety. These people worry about whether partner is available, responsive, attentive 2) attachment related avoidance. These people prefer not to rely on others − it is assumed that attachment styles vary in degree rather than in kind − secure adults are more likely than insecure adults to seek support from their partners when distressed, and are also more likely to provide support.Attributions that insecure adults provide make partners insecurities worse rather than better − fearfully avoidant adults are poorly adjusted despite defensive nature − dismissing avoidant adults use defensive strategies in an adaptive way − fearfully avoidant individuals aren't as able to suppress emotions as dismissive people − 2 questions involved in stability are “how much similarity is there between security people experience with different people in their life” and “how stable is security over time” − there is modest overlap between how secure someone feels with a parent and how secure they feel with a partner − stability with a parent remains the same throughout the relationship − attachment styles in parent-child domain and in romantic relationship are only moderately related based on some studies. − One study shows that existing relationships are updated/overwritten when new experiences are made Chapter 19: Sexuality Education Sexuality Education: The lifelong process of acquiring information about sexual behaviour and forming attitudes, beliefs, and values about identity, relationships and intimacy.  sexual health is a state of physical, emotional, mental and social well-being in relation to sexuality  sex ed should help people achieve positive outcomes and avoid negative ones SIECCAN: Sex Information and Education Council of Canada, a national resource for up-to-date information, research, and publications on human sexuality, including sexual health  relying on friends for sex ed is blind leading blind, relying on internet there is no quality control,  the main source of sex ed for children is at school  students who rated their parents efforts of teaching sex ed less highly were less in favour of schools AND parents sharing joint responsibility  students were more conservative than parents or teachers regarding when sex ed should start  majority of parents are in favour of sex ed in the schools  all Canadian provinces except Quebec have province wide-school based sex ed programs  comprehensiveness of sex ed in school boards vary between schools  Toronto's Human Sexuality Program was developed following a fatal beating of a gay student  first sex ed programs were concerned with transmission of knowledge, and goal was to reduce number of teen pregnancies. Later, emphasis was put on decision-making skills --> these programs were proven to be not very effective  in 1990s, focus of sex ed shifted from pregnancy prevention to HIV/AIDS knowledge --> this improved knowledge  Skills for Healthy Relationships program is designed for grade 9 students and aims to delay sexual activity, increase condom use, create compassion for people with HIV, and combat homo negativity, and was found to be successful  study found students in 2002 had less knowledge about HIV than students in 1980s. Abstinence Only Programs: programs that promote sexual abstinence until marriage as the sole means of preventing pregnancy and exposure to sexually transmitted infections − sex respect was a program designed for middle aged students to pledge abstinence − abstinence programs in reality didn't delay the onset of sexual activity − newest programs are comprehensive based on social science theories Social Inoculation Theory: proposes that people are better able to resist social pressure when they recognize the pressure and are motivated to resist it, and have rehearsed resisting it Social Learning Theory: emphasizes importance of practicing new skills that can be translated into behavioural Information-Motivation Behavioural model: emphasizes importance of health related info and enhanced skills and motivation to use the skills.  most programs increase students' knowledge but don't change their behaviour 6 Characteristics are associated with delaying the initiation of intercourse, reducing frequency of intercourse, reducing number of partners and increasing condom use: 1) Effective programs focus on reducing risk-taking behaviour 2) Effective programs are based on theories of social learning 3) Effective programs teach through experiential acvities that personalize the message 4) Effective programs address media and other social influences that encourage sexual risk-taking behaviours 5) Effective programs reinforce clear and appropriate values 6) Effective programs enhance communication skills  2/3 of programs that emphasize abstinence as well as safe sex were proven to be effective  students in schools where condoms were available reported being less likely to have intercourse, and were less likely to report recent intercourse  condom distribution programs are associated with reduction in teenage pregnancy  2 qualifications for a teacher teaching a sex ed program- must be educated about sexuality and must be comfortable talking about it  There are 3 reasons why parents don't provide much sex ed to their children: many people are embarrassed discussing sex, there are many things to know about sexuality that many adults do not know, parents don't know how to provide sex ed  Listen first, and then answer questions truthfully, honestly and accurately  the internet is an advantageous sex educator –materials get revised, it's anonymous and affordable, and can be accessed any time  when talking to your children about sex, you should be prepared, work to increase your comfort level, plan ahead, and be proactive  different sex practices are accepted in different cultures  in the past, people with intellectual disabilities were considered asexual  persons with developmental disabilities have normal sexual desires Chapter 10: Sexuality and the Life Cycle- Childhood/Adolescence  students are more likely to label a behaviour as having sex if it is done between mixed-sex vs same sex  recent innovation of “talking” computer to interview children's sexual habits  little research done on ethnocultural sexual habits in Canada  capacity for human body to show sexual response is present from birth  first sensuous relationship babies have is with their mother  most children progress to masturbation between 6-8 years old  self stimulation is a normal expression of sexuality in young kids  infants and young children are very self-centred   bond forms between child and parent immediately after birth  at age 2-3, children know what gender they are, and know they are like their parent of the same gender , at age 4-6 gender beliefs are very rigid  between 3-7, there's an increase in sexual interest  during late childhood, sexual play with people of same sex can be more common than sexual play with other gender  at 3 yrs old, children are interesting in different urinating postures, and are very touchy  at 4 yrs old, children are interested in pooping and bathrooms  1/2 of mothers report their children engaging in sexual play  Latency refers to period of preadolescence before resolution of Oedipus complex  pubic hair growth occurs due to the adrenarche (maturation of adrenal glands)  average age where sexual attraction to another person begins is 10 yrs old --> suggesting that adult sexual development starts at 9-10 yrs old and not at puberty  boys start masturbating earlier than girls do  little sexual behaviour with other gender during preadolescent period  age that youth have their first consensual sexual intercourse experience has been declining  majority of Canadians first engage in intercourse between 16-19 yrs old Gender-segregated Social Organization: a general form of social grouping in which males play and associate with other males, and females associate with other females. Genders are separate from each other --> this peaks between 10-12 yrs old  dating emerge
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