Responding to someone who crushes your arm? lady responded with my your strong?
He's looking for some to fight back to prove he's strong.
How does this response compare to the IAE response?
• IAE response seeks to develop understanding
• This response seeks to give acknowledgment.
IceBurganalogy -You see 10% of the iceberg above the waterline and 90% bellow the
Stuff above the water is positions , Bellow the water is Needs....and the middle is Wants.
Positions - stated solutions to an issue.
Interests- Needs , wants, fears, hopes. Reasons why we take the positions we do.
Middling, Interests: wants ( tangibles)
Foundational Interests : Wants( intangibles)
Interests can be mutual, compatible and incompatible.
Foundational interests are needs, Intangibles.
Belonging “ they are not letting me play” ( ex: ill send nasty letters to express my ned for
• Self- determination- i can do it myself
• His piece is bigger than mine
• Security can you hole me? Can i trust you?
• Success in some part of ones life (i can do it)
Case example- PPl sometimes throw away comments that are inflammatory,
How do throw away comments, relate to the positions and interests model?
• Its just an excuse for a drinking fest
• They are just being jerks.
Can you think of a case from the media that can be analyzed using the position interest
COMMUNICATION SKILLS USING P AND I
trying to get from the top of ice burg to the waterline.
How do we get positions to interests? open ended questions
Genuine curiosity- shift from judgement to curiosity.
Summarizing/ paraphrasing statements
Verbal indicators and body language to indicate good listening.
Appropriate revelation of own interests.
Tangible issues amongst palestinians- need for water, growing crops.
what are the intangible interests?
• Emerges when positions and interests are not faced.
• When you hear the term “ identity- based conflict”
• Conflict btw two groups easier to understand in group dispute context.
• Wants and needs are not being met, arise from psycho- cultural group concerns.
• The longer interests behind conflicts are unresolved , the more likely identity issues
are at stake or will emerge.
• Identifies are around- race gender, significant part of what lies on self definition.
• Plays into international disputes also btw two individuals of different cultures.
Whatisbullying?Using power over someone else.
Teasing builds relationship, taunting separates relationship.
Bullying diminishes our humanity.
Victim have any power? Bullying started bc he was favored for dancing, could have
social power. Teacher had power, kicked bully out of the dancing circle but it made the
bully worse. Had moral power when he became the good guy bc everyone knew the
other guy as bad and he was good.
What kind of power did the bully have?
Definitionofbullying-barbracolorosso-She puts bullying and genocide on a similar page.
bullying is peoples abusive power, conscious willful,deliberate activity intended to harm,
induce fear through threat of further aggression, to create of further aggression, to
create terror in target.