COMM 3523 Lecture Notes - Lecture 15: Extraversion And Introversion, Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder, Name Calling
Document Summary
During the fight: label your inferences. Explain why you draw the conclusions that you draw: reduce negative problem and negative solution talk. Negative problem talk: focusing on attacking the person instead of focusing on the behaviors that are causing the problem. Negative solution talk: proposing unrealistic solutions to a problem: avoid mindreading and critical talk. Mindreading: i know what you"re thinking. or i know how you"re going to act. Critical talk: personal criticisms: practice listening talk and positive problem talk. Listening talk: validating the other person"s opinions or feelings. Positive problem talk: dealing with the problem constructively. After the fight: confrontation is periodically reviewed to identify problematic patterns, progress reports on agreed-upon solutions, enacting reassurance ritual. Any behaviors enacted to reassure the other person of the commitment to the relationship: apologize for face-detracting statements and request forgiveness. Use talk rather than force: focus on communication opposed to resorting to force (manipulation)
