NURS2003 Chapter Notes - Chapter 11: Occupational Segregation, Role Conflict, Deinstitutionalisation
CHAPTER 11 – RELATIONSHIPS AND ROLES
Marriage
Marriages used to be practical unions often arranged by families
In the early twentieth century, as life expectancy increased dramatically, we
developed the modern idea that couples should be best friends and lovers for
50 years
Deinstitutionalisation of marriage: the decline in marriage and emergence of
alternate family forms that occurred during the last third of the twentieth century
During the late twentieth century, with the women’s movement, rising divorce
rates and especially the dramatic increase in unwed motherhood, marriage
became deinstitutionalised – less of a standard path in the Western world
In contrast to the Middle East, with its male-dominated marriages and in
Scandinavia where not getting marries is perfectly fine, in the U.S. we still
care deeply about getting married – but are reluctant to enter that state unless
we feel fairly financially secure
U-shaped curve of marital satisfaction: the most common pathway of marital
happiness in the West, in which satisfaction is highest at the honeymoon,
declines during the child-rearing years then rises after the children grow up
Couples can expect a decline in happiness, especially during the first 4 years
of married life; but, for those who stay together, there is often a u-shaped
curve of marital satisfaction, with happiness rising at the empty-nest stage to
a peak in old age
Although elderly married couples can be exceptionally happy, it’s important to
understand that there are many miserable 50-plus year marriages and some
couples stay as content after 5years as on their wedding day
Triangular theory of love: Robert Sternberg’s categorisation of love relationships
into three facets: passion, intimacy and commitment. When arranged at the
points of a triangle, their combinations describe all the different kinds of adult love
relationships
Consummate love: in Robert Sternberg’s triangular theory of love, the ideal form
of love, in which a couple’s relationship involves all three major facets of love:
passion, intimacy and commitment
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Married couples start out with consummate love, but passion and intimacy
can decline as partners construct separate lives
To preserve passion and intimacy, foster your partner’s inner development by
being an interesting human being and sharing your flow states with your mate
Happy couples make a high ratio of positive to negative comments, don’t get
personally hurtful or engage in demand-withdrawal interactions and are
committed to the relationship and their partner’s growth
Sacrifice and forgiveness – within reason – are important to commitment too
Demand-withdrawal interactions: a pathological type of communication in which
one partner, most often the woman, presses for more intimacy and the other
person, most often the man, tends to back off
Divorce, that common adult event, has several phases
There is a pre-divorce phase of marital unhappiness – possibly accompanied
by an affair – then the upheaval of the separation
Although divorce is very stressful, it can cause emotional growth and lead to
future happiness, but primarily if couples were very distressed earlier on (vs
simply feeling “a bit” unfulfilled with their mates)
Because mothers usually get custody of the children, divorced dads often face
the problem of losing their children and go on to remarry and have new
families
Both men and women struggle with the challenges and joys of step-
parenthood
Parenthood
Although many more people can become parents in our twenty-first-century
society, a major concern in Europe and Asia is declining fertility rates
Fertility rate: the average number of children a woman on a given country has
during her lifetime
Despite our negative stereotypes, childless adults are not more self-centred or
unhappy in old age
The transition to parenthood tends to lessen romance and intimacy
Gender roles become more traditional
Conflicts centred on marital equity can arise
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